Love Letter from Daddy

I fell in love today. With the emotions and chaos that surrounded the events yesterday, I never got an opportunity to let it all sink in. Charlotte held my hand (well, my finger) for the first time today, and with one touch my life was changed forever. I want so badly to pick her up, hold her, comfort her, and let her know I love her. For now, having her grasp my fingertip will have to do. She is the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning, and the last thing on my mind when I fall asleep. As a new father, it is my job to protect her and take care of her, but with her being in such critical care, the best thing I can do is get out of the doctors' and nurses' way. I wanted to be that father that is up three to six times a night feeding her, changing dirty diapers, and holding her as much as possible. Those responsibilities will have to wait. I find myself counting the days until I get to do those things. Charlotte is such a fighter. She has already been through more trauma in her two days of life than I have experienced in my entire life. She does not deserve a father feeling sorry for himself and wishing the first few days or weeks of her life would just pass as quickly as possible. Charlotte, I love you and cherish you. Even though my ideas of what a father is suppose to do may be on hold, I promise not to count the days, but to make the days count.

Love,
Daddy